Repentance

Hyo Jin Moon

November 19, 2006

Belevedere

Here are my notes from Hyo Jin nim’s speech Sunday 19 November 2006. My ability to convey what was actually said is limited. These, at most, convey some sense of what Hyo Jin nim said and are not a verbatim record. Hyo Jin nim’s website is: http://www.canaanstation.com/ To see two of the projects that Hyo Jin nim is working on log on to: http://definingmoment.tv/ and http://definingmoment.eu/

Joe Kinney

Rev. Andrew Compton is the MC. All welcome Hyo Jin nim and offer a bow.

(Hyo Jin nim bows to the audience as he approaches the stage. He places a small notebook on the podium.)

Good morning.

Some of you should have stayed home. (Laughter)

Do you want to be happy or do you want to be sad? (Happy)

I’m sorry, but my topic is repentance.

Penitence demands repentance right?

Do you like to see humble people or do you like to see arrogant people?

There are so many ways to see people these days because everybody wants to be somebody. They want to prove that they have something to offer, whether it’s for money, power, whatever in the secular setting. It takes a lifetime to prove.

Why? Perfection is given by God, not you. The ultimate judge is not you. When you even ponder the notion of individual perfection you’re only kidding your self if you don’t understand how things ultimately get judged.

Your parents force you to go to school and in the end the grade matters. It’s not you who dictate how you graduate with a certain grade that you think that you deserve. This system reflects the basic outcome of dying. That’s the basic premise that you have to accept. What you’re actually experiencing is a little taste of it.

You have no control over your perfection. That is the ultimate irony, because you can’t judge yourself to be perfect. It lasts forever. It doesn’t work like that. Basically you’re going through a certain conditioning process. It’s not easy to get good at anything.

I’m here to talk to my age group or above. That’s my forum here. It has nothing to do with what else I can do. Everything has a purpose. It’s very specific. You have to target it to the point in which it matters, to what you’re actually trying to accomplish in that specific event or scenario. If I see little kids I know I’m talking you your parents. I’m not going to talk to you. It’s not my focus. I can do that some other time, some other situation, I am here trying to do what I think is appropriate, that I can best serve for the greater purpose.

You have a whole lot of time ahead of you. I hate to see a lot of young people here. I want to see a lot of old people here. (Laughter) I see young people when I go home.

You don’t have to change anything. You have to change what is real. Real is not always you. Real is what is real. That’s what we have to understand; real is always beyond you. That’s why God is a suffering God, because He has a concept that makes Him a slave for all sorts of whatever in terms of time.

Please do not think that everything revolves around you. Repentance is a very necessary tool for conscience because it keeps you motivated. It keeps you moving forward. It evolves you to find your perfection ultimately. Even that is not dictated by you. You don’t have absolute control over that end.

You will have to die first to have the finality of that. Do you understand me? That is absolute. No one is an exception. Ultimately it has to be represented, because the messiah is the representation.

How do you go about using the tool that we have? It’s a tool. Conscience, the device that makes of do something, that tries to make us better is a tool. It’s a blessing it’s a gift from God. A blessing is a tool that comes from God.

It’s something that will aid you and support you, to make you something better than you are. You have to know how to properly use that, because if you don’t, you’ll mess it up. You’ll loose the opportunity. You can’t blame it on anyone else. In the end it is your responsibility to correct what ever you have to correct, what ever you have to complete, what ever you have to perfect.

When you talk about the concept of perfection, it is all about your idiosyncrasies. "I’m somebody special!" Perfection is just about catering to that nonsense. "I’m special." Special in what? You must prove it in the end. You have to die for it. You have to prove it by dying, and in doing so you’ll prove your idiosyncratic unique greatness, however minute, however miserable it might be.

Trying to go beyond that and getting into grandiosity… Why do you want to do that?

Do you think that you can change the world without going through the basic process of things? I don’t think so. If you don’t understand what is basic, you can’t even find yourself. There’s no way you’re going to get a grade. That’s just the way it is.

Then what the hell are you dying for? That’s the problem. There is no one else that’s going to answer that question other than you, your individual self.

Why is repentance necessary? Because it keeps you busy, because lazy people get corrupted.

When people get rich… When politicians seek office because they believe their ideals are better than the other guy, they imagine that if I just get power I will change the world. The problem is that when you have an environment that is susceptible to all sorts of stuff that is not right for individual growth in this rich country that is more privileged than other countries. You’re going to have problems when things start to come easier and easier for you. Obviously you’re going to get corrupted. Why? You have less time to repent and repentance at least keeps you busy.

You try to be responsible for your own good, whatever you did, and screw everybody else. "I did this and I’m responsible!" Repentance is a tool of conscience; through the evolving process that hopefully can give you that completion that you desire. If you hold on to it maybe you have a chance, but if you let it go you have no chance.

Right or wrong, in the end you have to stand, because God will judge you. Even Sun-Myung Moon will be judged by God. My Father, the Messiah will be judged by God. Absolutely!

I believe that. That’s how I’ve learnt. That’s how I accept. There is no exception to the rule. If anybody says otherwise… you have to look at the monkey and see where the tail lies and step on it. If you do something wrong you are going to suffer one way or the other. It doesn’t matter how you excuse your self. If you’re man enough you wouldn’t.

Everybody can be broken. In a war situation when someone is a torturer, they’re the one who has the self-righteousness on their side. They are the one who is greater and superior. That’s what gives them the right to torture their enemy prisoners to make them repent for their sins against you.

Everybody can be broken. What does that prove in war? Nothing.

Let’s talk about historical indemnity. Let’s say that you went through that torture for the sake of humanity, for your lineage. Make it true to that. Don’t say anymore beyond that. Let it go. You move on and think about your self from now on, because nobody is going to take care of you. You have to take care of your self and each other, if we have a community; if we’re building one.

I would like to see all sorts of… I don’t want to see just yellow faces in my family…

I don’t intend to be something more than what I am. That is the essence of people like me. That means a lot. I don’t care what people say. I make my own decisions.

What’s important is what is good, what is basic, that can ultimately bring the idealism regardless of who we are. That’s the most important thing.

You think you can make a living, yes, but what if everything collapses? If you have a lazy mind it will be absolutely corrupt. And you have an environment that caters to that kind of reality then it will pretty much wipe out the young generation. We can change it. We can make a difference.

Define what you get beyond your self. Try; keep on trying until you see the light in your own way. I don’t care how long it takes. I hope you make it before you die. I can’t help you beyond that. If you don’t take care of your residual stuff it will get passed down and somebody else will bear the greater burden. That’s just the way it is.

What if an asteroid the size of Jupiter comes from outside our solar system and you get vaporized? You want to know the truth, start with your self.

Everybody has the voice to be heard, but don’t kid yourself. Do something before you die. And you will die. You will die of disease, accident, suicide, or natural cause. You will die. Even if you live to your fullest, how long do you think you will live? Do you know how you’re going to be judged? Are you working on your grade? Do you really know what you’re going to be graded upon? Be real, alright.

Do you think people want to be a prostitute? Do you think people want to be a junkie? Do you think people want to be a criminal? Do you think people want to be a con-artist? No, but they do for all sorts of reason.

So there is no body like that among the young people in this room, so at least that is a pride you can point out. You have to be real. Balance your reality, your physical self, your mind status, and your physical awareness. If you have a family situation where you can exchange with your folks, by all means take that opportunity, because you’re lucky if you can have that. I don’t think that there is any parents if they have the ideal scenario that would let that kind of opportunity go to waste.

(From now until the end of the speech, Hyo-Jin-nim was very emotional and often in tears. There were several long emotional pauses)

Please be aware of your situation. Please be aware of your reality. Know what it offers. Always measure your self. If you want to grow have to have balance so you have to know the extremes. As you grow the extremes will only get bigger. It will constantly expand; you have to grow into it. The stupid thing about arrogance is that you think when you reach some kind of level that you’re in control. You have some kind of sick sense of superiority. It doesn’t work like that.

If you want to be something then you have to constantly… That’s why children’s concept of reality is dominated by all these role models that they can make a lot of money and they can get their presents and get their fix. That’s where the titillation factor is, at the edge.

You have to get into things to a certain point to appreciate them. If you just use music as a kind of sonic background for a party, that’s actually defeating the property of music itself. You have a different agenda other than music.

Before we talk to our kids we have to question ourselves as parents. You have to be responsible. Yeah I did wrong. No excuses. Did I love my kids? I’d be in hell for them. It’s easy when I take all the responsibility, blame. I’ll pay for it until they come back.

So in America I have a different kind of justice because I’m Reverend Moon’s son. That’s absolutely unique. Anyway God will judge. Please, please, please.

You don’t know me that well. Since you’re in this room and I see a response, I’m just reacting. I react to things to a point. Today just happens to be one of those days. It’s OK. I’m just responding to you. You have to be willing to go a long ways through all sorts of difficult crap and suffering. You can’t get away that easy.

All I’m here for is for sharing. I’ll do what I do.

Homogeneity is about the closest thing we have to monarchy, because there is no such thing as a pure monarchy in today’s political situation. Conservatism is a little closer than liberalism. America’s standing id very young. Liberalism is the opposite because it’s an adversarial system. The point is that is something tries to hold on to boundaries, and then something else will try to do away with boundaries. That’s the problem. That’s what we have to deal with. That’s the kind of work that has to be done in Democratic free society, especially in a developed nation.

That’s why repentance is very important. You have to make sure that the politicians don’t get lazy. It doesn’t matter whether you’re a democrat or Republican. In homogenous countries like Korea and Japan there are many political parties, but if you screw up you pay. Everybody is after you. Why? Because it is a homogenous society.

When you are dealing with all sorts of different races and cultures, it is very difficult. That’s why certain basic principles are very important. We have to master those. We have to project those. We have to make that better, not just in terms of presentation, but in reality.

You can’t make a living with just words. It’s body mind and spirit. You are going to be judged one day. I believe in God. I might not believe in you or I might not believe in anything else; I might not even believe in me, but I believe in God.

Some time I don’t know how I’m going to do what I have to do, where I have to start. I just have to figure it out. That’s how I start. Nonetheless in the end you have to prove it. If you expect things to be easy and you expect the best then you will be corrupted; you don’t know your own limitations. You think of awesome things and expect the best in every way; I’m American crap and in the end it all comes crashing down.

If you want something to last, you’d better know what you’re asking for. Isn’t that obvious even when you buy a used car don’t you want to ask basic questions and have knowledge before going ahead with the purchase?

I’m just talking about secular things, but if you think about ideal things then you’d better understand the basic things because the basic things are important. That’s reality.

How much you want to do is up to you. You can always enjoy the security of your boundaries. Boundaries are secure. If you can protect your boundaries you have security. If you try to expand them you’re asking for trouble. There’s risk involved, uncertainty. But how far are you willing to go, in what way, for what reason. Because every time you skip a generation you go into that basic premise.

You need to question your self. I know that’s the way; I know that is reality, but how far are the people on top willing to go? If you want to do something there is a basic principle. Just ask yourself "Am I willing to die for this?" It’s nobody else’s business but mine.

That’s always why I ask you to think about dying. Living is easy because you’re already breathing. You’re living right now. It’s easy for you. Dying is important. Dying is harder, reaching perfection is much more hard. Living, you just take for granted just sitting there and you breathe and eat and think what you want because you are allowed at this point in time. You get comfortable with this and the same thing happens and you want to take it to the next level and the next level and the next level. What level are we talking about?

You can say that New Yorkers are jaded and sophisticated but they aren’t going to change the world. They live in the Capital of Capitalism; in the end nobody takes them seriously. They aren’t going to change the world. It’s just about them.

Familiarity gives you some kind of confidence, but you have to understand that confidence can be a double edged sword. In what way are you confident?

Anyway, OK. So I need to repent. There’s always room to repent. I need to repent because I didn’t intend to be like this today.

For what ever its worth if this helps you, nobody is ever going to do this to you again, maybe your mommy or something. Let’s just be happy because I believe that it’s doable. I do. I do. It is doable. We just have to do it step-by-step. We’ve just got to in reality. We have to have it in reality. We need it in reality. We need more of it.

Hey! It’s not too late right? You don’t want to think it’s to late right?

Do you want this to go on?

Do you want me to come every Sunday?

How Long? Give me the days.

How long do you see that being?

You give me a time and I’ll do it. What ever.

How long? That’s what I’m asking.

(One sister says "forever") (Laughter)

I’ll be here as long as you need me.

If you don’t need me just tell me so and I’ll disappear. I’ll be more than happy to disappear.

Take care of yourselves OK.