Hyo Jin Moon
June 23, 1991
Belvedere, New York
Good morning everybody. Today, what I would like to share with you is my view of the nature of an Abel person, what defines Abel. Father has invested, as you know, not just in terms of spiritual investment, but physically and substantially he invested all of his life in America. You all know, because you have been Unification Church members for quite a long time, and many of you have been here from the beginning of Father's ministry here in America. Father said in many of his speeches that the most important thing is realizing or understanding the heart of God. We understand certain things, we understand the particular abilities that God has given us. Through those idiosyncrasies we have a certain ability to give input into things that we are commissioned to do. In that sense, we have certain abilities which are a determining factor in many different cases.
But, what is Abel? Many times Father says knowledge alone, or power alone, or authority alone, all these things in themselves cannot truly represent God's intention or God's will. And certainly those things are not enough to substantiate the course of restoration and the dispensation of God.
What is important? What is the true ability of man? Where does that lie? Father has invested specifically in building the seminary at Barrytown. The purpose of Father's having that seminary is to what? Just to make people theologians, is that it? Once we have these people who have degrees, who have certain abilities in terms of interpreting, in terms of knowledge and understanding about theological theories or whatever, does it end there? What is the meaning behind Father investing so much of his time acquiring and building that kind of facility and cycling many of you through that particular institution? What is he trying to obtain? What is the meaning of Father's investment?
Many of you have graduated from seminary. And many of you are proud that you have greater understanding now. But what are you going to do with that understanding? What is your purpose behind acquiring this greater understanding? The bottom line is that, through this we must go out and preach the word. The bottom line is that whatever we have that has been bequeathed from Father, the meaning behind this bequeathing is that through this process, we can go out and restore the world. We want to change these people who do not understand the will of God and make them understand. Propagate the word of God. He did not send you there to get titles so that you can have prestige. The bottom line is how much you can do with the things that have been given to you by Father in witnessing; going out to the world, reaching out and touching other people. Touching other people who have no idea whatsoever about what we are. They don't know what is going on. They don't know what the motivation was behind Father investing all his life, behind Father suffering and bearing the suffering course.
You know about this Inquisition book. Little by little things are coming out in the open. The reality, the truth, is coming out into the open. All the time while Father was here being persecuted unjustly, what was his motivation, what was his intention during all those troubled and suffering times? What are we to do when we receive these things from Father and this kind of investment where Father literally spent all of his time trying to motivate us, trying to incite us into doing the work that needs to be done in order to restore this world? Father certainly did not send all those people, Father did not invest in these people to go out and get Ph.D.s so that they could go out and praise themselves! That was not the intention. His intention was that you, by Father's investing in you, can go out with the investment that you have received and give ten times, maybe a hundred times or more in return to change this world, make this world understand the will of God.
That is why he invested. And that's what we need to do. We must find within ourselves, what are we able, what are we capable of doing in terms of bringing more and more people, letting people outside understand the intention of God and the true intention of our Parents. That is the bottom line here. If we can achieve this goal solely by the means of cycling people through the seminary, so be it! Let us all go to seminary and let us all get whatever degree we need. If that is the only way to change these people, let's by all means do so. But that is not the reality. Reality is much different than that. The bottom line is that the reason Father invests so much in so many things is because all those things are important. But you must understand that these abilities that you have are not there for yourself. You have received life, you have literally received life, and a spiritual life from Father. Based on this you must return back. Based on the life that you have received, you must give your life in return. So the abilities that you possess must create some kind of benefit. That might not sound so romantic, however it must have some kind of input into the whole picture of the dispensation. That is the bottom line.
What is Abel? Let's see it as the ability that is needed, the thing that is needed in a given time frame. In a way, the Abel person, the description of an Abel person is based on what is needed. I guess to a certain degree it's relative to a certain time frame and based on that specific time frame, Abel is what is needed to bring certain resolution to whatever is needed. Do you understand what I am trying to say? At a given moment, what do we need? What do I need? If I have a business and if I have financial problems, or problems organizing the business, the Abel person in my own eyes, is that person who can manage and organize my financial situation. Obviously, to me that person is Abel. Whatever the case is, given a certain time frame, what is needed to bring resolution to what I need, you can see that person as Abel. Abel is a person having certain ability, certain value to me.
If that is the case, then Father also needs Abel people surrounding him to do the kind of work necessary. And what is that kind of work that he needs to do? It's simple. Father needs people who can represent him, who can go out to the world and tell people, "Hey, this is what God needs. This is the purpose of life. This is the meaning of life." He needs people who can go out and truly become a testament to the existence of God and can truly represent Father every step of the way. Father needs somebody who can go out and change young people who are struggling with many teenage problems. Father needs people who can bring clarity into confusion.
When you look at American society you see it is filled with confusion. There are so many obstacles out there; just growing up is a tremendous challenge. You go to school and you've got so many problems. Why? Because there are so many different values, and based on this barrage of confusing values (values just lingering on everywhere we go), kids are all perplexed. It is very difficult to keep a steady course. Everywhere you go there are influences which somehow make you deviate from the course that you are trying to pursue. There is so much peer pressure, problems with drugs and problems with sex. There are so many there is no point in even counting these things. However, the reality is that any child growing up is faced with these obstacles every step of his or her way to maturity. And in many cases unfortunately, they never mature.
So what is needed? Who is going to go to these troubled children while they are growing up? You know the importance of the period of growth. While they are maturing, who is going to go to these kids and say, "Hey, I know you are confused, but listen to me. If there is a God existing and you want to know about God, if you want to know the meaning of life. . . There are many other people out there who are more than willing, more than happy to give their own opinions, but listen to me, this is Reverend Moon's opinion, this is Reverend Moon's view of life and of God." Who is going to ultimately influence them and change their lives? Are you just going to wait until all these kids, miraculously, automatically, somehow just change?
If you really think that will happen, by all means, go ahead, just sit and wait. Let's all sit back and wait. Not just for the teenagers and children of the second generation, but even for the first generation; how are you going to get proper insights about who Father is to the public? How are you going to do that? That's why we have to mobilize what we have available to us. Being stubborn is fine, it's great. Why? Because you have to be stubborn to a certain degree to block off and fight the temptation that is always around you. You must be stubborn to be victorious in confronting Satan. However, you can't be stubborn when it comes to what is needed.
What we need is a truly different approach to witnessing, a different approach to getting the word out into American society.
As I have more and more people coming to the Manhattan Center, I've been steadily sending these people to workshop. In one particular incident, one of the band members of Ancestors went to a two day workshop at Camp Sunrise. Before he went we gave him one day lecture and I thought it would be a good experience for him to have experience with other newcomers to our church. So I sent him there. While he was in workshop, you know the workshop schedule is very tight; it's one thing after another just constantly. I guess there was an old member who also went to this workshop to, I guess to refresh his memory or rejuvenate his spiritual standing, and obviously he had a certain interest in music. He was excited that the band member came. During this person's day, the long-time member, who was forty odd years old, dogged him around everywhere he went. He would bring his guitar and sing to him. This new guy, the band member, tried very hard just to be friendly. He did, he stayed friendly to the end. I'm sure it was a very difficult thing for him. He is really inspired by Father's work, but after he came back, he was really inspired by the Principle, but he was kind of confused because he thought to himself, "Look at this guy, he is forty-five years old and still coming to workshop." He kind of looked at himself and thought, "Hey, is this me when I'm forty-five?" At that moment he struggled.
I know this older brother had good intentions to try to be friendly with him. In his mind he was trying to make him comfortable by showing him we Moonies love music, but the band member already knows that. I guess he just wanted to reinforce the idea just to be friendly and to get acquainted. That's fine. But you have to understand that presentation is very important when we are dealing with these people, especially in America, where so many things are available and people have seen an excess of what is great. There is such an excess of everything, it's not like in a third world country where people are literally starving and the greatest thing to them at that moment is food. Its not like that here in America. America is filled with excess. So we have to be very careful with presentation. In Russia, it is a different story. Russia is now coming out of communism, it is coming out of misery, and they're just dying to change. They're eager to change because they know what they want to become. They want to become just like America. They want to achieve American standards. They want to achieve that kind of physical development. Do you understand what I am saying? They want to have physical well-being and have a certain environment where there is great wealth and great well-being. That is what they want to achieve. They want to become affluent just like America. They want to be successful like America. In many people's eyes, especially in other parts of the world, America is a symbol of achievement and they are looking at America to become just like here. They want to have this kind of excess too.
Even when I was going to high school, kids could buy their own car just by mowing lawns all summer long. All the kids would say, '"What are you going to do this summer?" "I'm going to work. I'm going to just mow the lawn all summer long because I need a car." Where the hell in the world can you mow a lawn for a few months and get a car? It might sound funny to you, but you grew up in that kind of environment. Do you understand what I am saying? That is the kind of environment you grew up in and you try to take certain, I mean if you don't understand this American reality, it's very difficult to get to an individual's heart and really touch these people. You have to understand where our consciousness comes from. Obviously, in order for us to be aware of something there have to be certain needs. However, it's not just the need that makes a certain impression upon our consciousness. It's not just the need. You have to be emotionally involved. Based on the need, the need itself has to be emotionally accepted and realized. The value of need has to be emotional. That's when certain things come into our consciousness. That's when the awareness starts taking on certain meaning in our lives. Many of you have had spiritual experiences. Many of you have cried tears; I don't know if you cried the tears that Father cried, but you have tasted the tears that Father has shed for the suffering of God. You know you need change in your life. You know that there has to be change in this world and you have felt it.
But many of you do not understand the Principle as much as Father expects of you, many of you even have the wrong understanding about Principle. We have all different understandings. Many of you look at God based on your own desire of how He should be. You search for your god, not God and who He is. That is your problem. You know there is a need to change this world and that need is emotional.
Homosexuals, the kind of lifestyle that they lead is very emotional to them. If somebody tries to take that away from them they will fight until they are dead. What am I trying to say? They need that kind of life. They need to be stimulated anally. Through this sickening love making ritual, they have grown into an emotional state where they have to embrace these things. To them it is something that they desperately need because that is where their value is. The whole thing, the meaning of life is to have pleasure at every end of the body. That is their need, that is their absolute desire, that is their goal in life. Nothing else matters to them. That is the greatest thing they can ever attain. Based on that need they will give and take.
I bond with my guitar. I have an emotional experience with my guitar because I give and take with it every day. It is hard for me to let it go because I've changed its strings, I've cleaned it. It doesn't talk to me, well it talks to me in a sense, but I've bonded with this stupid piece of wood and it's emotional. When I depart from it, I know it's going to be painful. I know. I gave one of my guitars to the band Sunrise Ocean when I was in Japan last year when I played for them and did a little speaking tour. I gave them my guitar after I performed. That was very heartbreaking to depart from my guitar, but maybe they needed it more than I. It's a good kind of symbolic gesture that they were inspired by, so I gave it to them. That is the only reason. But even with the stupid piece of wood, I get attached. You reciprocate with anything for a while, whether it is for a good intention or bad intention, whether it is for a good purpose or a bad purpose, you will reach a certain, I can't say perfection, but you will reach a certain moment, you will reach a certain plateau, let's put it that way.
I'm vulgar sometimes. But you like it that way, don't you?
Instilling the need for a change in American people's minds and their hearts is a very challenging task because you must incite their emotions. Do you understand what I am saying? In the early days when our movement was beginning, we were in a poor country. Every year Father had a regional directors meeting and every time that meeting came about, afterwards, Father normally took all the leaders to eat bulgogi. Once a year. And I lived for that day. When I was a child, I lived for that day. Why? Because I don't like kimchee. I only like meat, but I didn't have any. It was just soy sauce and eggs sometimes, other times thin strips of beef drenched in soy sauce for the purpose of preserving it for a long time. So I lived for that day. To me, it was like going to America, the land of beef. All these cowboys running with hundreds of thousands of cows. To me, in my mind, that image translated into tons of beef. People say this land is literally just lined with milk and honey and steak everywhere and it's true. Steak and eggs are only a dollar in Las Vegas, right? Where else can you get that kind of meal in this world other than in America? It is very difficult to find.
To me, coming to America was personally a very spiritual moment. As a child, my body literally longed for that day. Every cell of my body longed for that day. But when it came it was a different story. However, just the thought of Father coming to America, and Father having all these things like Belvedere -- to me, Father looked great. Truly in my child-like eyes, I don't know how long ago, he looked like he could make himself into whatever he wanted to be and I'd believe it. Because that is where my hope was. My hope was to eat a lot of beef as a child. That was my favorite food, but I never really had the opportunity to experience the kind of moments you can have with the things that you really desire. And I was waiting for that moment to happen. Father looked great to me at that moment. I was going to America.
In the same way, people were inspired by Father's words. Where there is hopelessness all over, in prison, many people flocked to Father's words. He gave them the word of freedom and liberation. Why did these people flock to him? Because there is absolutely no hope in prison. There is hopelessness everywhere you look. With the kind of torture, the kind of hard, forced labor that everybody had to face, and the kind of meals that they received every day... they had no hope, absolutely zilch! But Father would speak about restoring mankind and the vision of God. He would talk about God's heart in a place where there is hopelessness. It is like a child who was eagerly waiting for that juicy steak. It is the same feeling.
Mr. Pak, that man who followed Father in prison, right after he came out, he tagged along for a while and then he split. Obviously Father's words had one meaning in prison, but those same words had a different meaning to Mr. Pak when he came out into the reality. That happened because his desire changed. In prison his absolute desire was to survive, that's it. "Surviving is my absolute desire, absolute need, absolute necessity." That is how he thought at that moment, but when he came out, outside the prison after he was liberated, his needs started to change. "Screw this Bible business, I'm surviving. I need to get on to the next step in life. What is my need?" His needs started to change and that is why he left. Many of you stuck by and I praise you, you kept the right priority of certain needs. Although you did not have a clear understanding, I guess you felt it sacred enough to hold on to your needs until now. I praise you that much. People have many needs and based on these needs, they change. That's the whole problem. I guess this Pak guy, when he split, was more emotionally drawn to something other than Father's words, maybe sex or something. Maybe he had some opportunity to become reacquainted with his old comrade-in-arms who had a high ranking position and maybe he became politically ambitious. I don't know what reason he had but he left because his needs changed. Obviously Father's words did not have the same kind of influencing impact on his needs. I'm not trying to drive it into you; it's the reality.
Why do some people pursue money or fame or power? Why do they do that? "I need money so I can buy things. I need to be driven around in a chauffeured limousine. I need to be flown around in my own private 747. 1 need to be dragged behind my 250 foot yacht while I water ski behind that sucker. I don't want to water ski behind a little dinghy. I've gotta water ski and I need to do it behind a 350 foot yacht! I need to plaster my house with gold fixtures. I need a diamond studded tombstone. That's what I need."
"I need power. Why? Because I want to be great. I don't want no one to tell me what to do. I'm going to tell everybody what to do. That's why I want the power. That's why I need it."
"I need all these women. Why? Because I need to be titillated. I need to be sensitized by my sexual organs. That's the meaning of my life. Whatever makes me happy I'll do it, and it just happens to be having sex with loose women."
You know very well that half of the marriages in America end in divorce. There are a lot of marital problems here. The three important things that Father teaches are parental love, conjugal love and filial love. If you don't obtain a family you can never attain any of these three. You can never understand the meaning behind these three things, the three stages of love that you must understand in order to become God's ideal object. Their marriages break apart. What's the most prevalent cause? One spouse is going out and having sex with other people; playing around. There are some cases of abuse and stuff like that, but mostly it is because they are not faithful to their marriage. They're not faithful to their commitment.
We are God-like beings so we have God-like desires and God's desire is to obtain true love. In order to attain true love you must have a true object who has within himself the same value, the same vision, the same goal, the same intent, the same desire and the same needs. That's what we have to become in order to become God's object of love. And that desire is absolute.
When you look at the rest of humanity as your brothers and sisters, but amidst this sea of people, when the time comes you will pick one person. From the sea of God's children, a mate is chosen for you and based on the union of these two entities, your individual perfection can be reached. Your perfection as a human being. Let me put it this way, your individual perfection can be transmitted to a degree where you are prepared to receive the Blessing; however, perfection as a human being can only come when you are united with a partner in marriage. That is the only way. That bond has to be absolute in order to attain eternal love. That union must be absolute. If that does not happen, the union between God and man can be severed at any time. The relationship is erratic and not an eternal one.
Of course we can act like a seal or a dog and have sex with everything in sight. If I am strong, healthy and beautiful, I can have a whole harem of women around me. However, because we are God-like beings, that's not the plan. If that happens, if we do that, the conflict will never cease. Do you understand what I am saying? If you go out and take my wife at will, at your own discretion, do you think I'm going to sit and watch you have sex with my wife? I'll get you and that woman too. Do you understand what I'm saying? And many people do that. They don't just entertain that idea, but they go out and buy a gun and shoot the person who did that to them. Just for that practical sense, monogamy is absolutely needed. For the purpose of attaining and substantiating eternal love, there can only be one spouse. Right? Because the relationship between God and man is eternal. You can never sever it at will. That is the, most important thing.
You understand what I'm drifting to, right? In order for you to be secure, in order for you have stability, what must you have? For example, in a society, what must you have? Certain uniform codes? Is that all? What's the meaning of having law? The obvious reason is so we can predict our own behavior. Once we can predict, we have stability. Unpredictability causes chaos, confusion, uncertainty and obscurity. Predictability brings us stability. However, within a society, where everything can be predicted, does it have excitement? How does excitement come? From unpredictable things, right? Just picture yourself riding a roller coaster for the first time. A great big sucker is just standing there, monolithic, huge, humongous! You've ridden roller coasters before but just by looking at this sucker you know it is incomparable to anything you have ridden in the past. It's huge. You're are anticipating it. Your heart is beating. You are in line, getting closer and closer to the point where you're going to ride on this sucker. You get on it and your heart beats quicker and quicker. You are climbing up this humongous mountain-like hill. You're on top of it. You're filled with anticipation because you don't know what is going to happen. Of course you know it is going to fall, but you don't know how that is going to affect you. How will it excite you, how will each turn affect you? All those thoughts rush through your mind and all these unknowns excite you.
Having said that, we need these kind of exciting things that are unpredictable things. Where can we get unpredictable things in life which are acceptable, which are allowed? There are two things; sports and art.
In sports the concept is pretty limited however. Of course you know to make a goal you have to kick the ball in and out, but the play, how you kick it in, how this guy manipulates the ball, how he catches the ball or whatever, you can't predict that. That's why it excites us. You can never predict how each play is going to take place. You know it's going to happen, you're going to dunk in the ball. Also, when you're chasing a woman, when you have sex with her, you know it will feel good, but how is it going to happen? How is that moment going to happen? That unpredictability is exciting. Do you understand what I am saying? That uncertainty is what excites you. That's why many people can never get out of their single lifestyle. Why? Because they love that unpredictability, they love that chase. You can have sex with anyone -- an ugly bitch, a fat bitch, skinny or whatever, it's the same thing. But the chase is what excites you.
But in art, the reason it has greater impact is because it carries ideas. It's not just physical play or a physical thing. It carries concepts, it carries ideas, it carries greater symbolism than sports do. Think about it. How are you going to let the people of this world, at this moment, visualize what can happen in the ideal world? How are you going to bring that unforeseen reality into foreseeable reality? You tell me a better means to do that. How are you going to do that? With just words? Well, obviously to American society, words aren't enough. Why? Because you are sensitized to the maximum. It literally has to stimulate all your senses, all your cursory senses, all your perceptive senses; how you perceive things and the way these perceived things affect you. You have to utilize the way in which these things happen to you. You need more than people from other places in the world. Why? Because you are filled with excess. Think about it. How are you going to convey, how are you going to influence, how the hell are you going to persuade American people that Father's way of living will benefit them and change their lives for the better? How are you ever going to let that possibility be seen in front of their eyes? Of course, through our experience, our examples as well, but that is not enough. It must provoke emotions. Do you understand what I am saying? We have to rake in, we have to utilize all the things in creation that is possible, to incite our emotions.
I'm not saying that the old ways are wrong and we have to completely change our way. But even nature changes it's form, even the mountains crumble, even the sea boundaries change. However, the content doesn't change. This creation still belongs to God no matter what form it takes. It doesn't matter how you look, you're just as much a child of God as he is. You have to understand we're not changing the spirit or content inside. Time changes, you change physically, we're just talking about a physical format here. How we witness to people and how we conduct our workshop; we have to critically evaluate these things. The kind of workshop format we have now is not suitable. We have to change our body. The body has to mature with time. I'm not saying the time itself is ideal, but we have to be physically mature enough to deal with the reality of the changing times. The content is not changing, it still belongs to Father. That is what I'm trying to do with the Manhattan Center. I want to go out and preach; propagate Father's words. To win the people is the bottom line, isn't it? Why do you think Father has invested in some members and allowed them to get these Ph.D. degrees? With that investment Father expects them to go and witness to more people. That's what we have to do. We have to reevaluate ourselves.
I am my own critic. Have you heard my latest album? I am almost finished with another one. I'm going to finish it by the end of this month. I'm going to continue until I have 120 songs. I'm almost there. I'm up to ninety, thirty more and I'm set. Then I'll do something else. I don't want to be a musician for the rest of my life. I don't care what I do, I really don't because I don't value any one thing, I value everything. That is what Father taught me, and that is what I think is one of the most important things that Father is trying to teach me. We must understand the value of all the goodness that God has bestowed upon each one of you. Goodness. That's what I want. I look at everybody, I know there are some bad points, some deficiencies, but I try to see and pickup what is good in you. That is the case inside the church, though some people might argue that it is not; however, when you go out into the world, that isn't the reality. Do you understand what I am saying? That's why we have to be great, we have to be excellent. We have to do our best to be the best at whatever we are given. That is our responsibility. Fulfilling responsibility has everything to do with your profession. You have the freedom of choice and you have volition. The reason you have these things is because you must mature.
Think about it, of all the possibilities that exist out there, God has chosen the predictable, God has chosen the ideal of love. Because He has chosen this ideal love to be eternal, that ideal is predictable. Based on this if everybody shares this idea, then we can have a stable, secure world. When He balances, we have to let duality exist within. However, the important thing of this existing duality is having established this ideal subject and object foundation. The predictable ideals of love are subject over all the unpredictable possibilities. All the unpredictable object possibilities support to make the fullness, to make life full in the subject predictable way of living. My life, the Principle life and life in the church are all very predictable. We have formula course and we have specific traditions. However, our life becomes exciting, becomes full with all these arts. When we entertain ourselves or listen to music it excites us. I especially love music that is unpredictable because it excites me. Predictable music is okay sometimes, when I am in a certain mood it can be good but most of the time I like unpredictable things. I am very physical, but I need to be stimulated -- not just physically. I listen to music and literally get physically stimulated, but at the same time intellectually too. Just following along with the music I try to pick out and when unpredictable things happen its great! So within the bounds of predictability you have to let the unpredictability dwell within it. But it is the object to the predictable subject of Principle life.
Obviously, from the beginning God said do not take the fruit of good and evil, if you do you shall surely die. What is that supposed to mean? You can die or you can not die. That unpredictable circumstance, how are we going to perfect ourselves? You figure it out. Why do you think we need an order, why do you think we need a figure of respect? Because without having a subjective figure there is no harmony. Because there needs to be a centralness, a grounding. You must have certain ground on which unity can be attained. Otherwise it is all separate. That's why it is important for a family to be intact. That is why it is important for a child to have a respectable father. Having that respectable figure in our lives is important. When nothing else is sacred that is when we ourselves become not sacred. We have to have a certain sacredness in our lives. Do you understand what I am saying?
By the language that I choose to use at this certain moment, you don't see a dignity in it, I know that. I'm tying to make you understand so I don't have to say these things to you. I'm trying to excite you guys. Come on let's get up and do something. I like challenges, I'll stick my neck out, so what? Images can be changed. You might see me with a certain image at this moment, but that image can change for the better. I will certainly not try to change it for the worse. But the bottom line is that I want you to get up and do something about it. Because you can't expect and can't attain perfection by someone doing it for you. You've got to perfect yourself. Father gives us his experience about having relationship with God. That is what he is trying to teach us. But the experience with God in our lives has to be acquired by our own efforts. It can never be given to you, you have to make it happen. I'm sorry to use that old cliche, but you've got to earn it, you've got to make it happen within yourself. You can never be given an experience about God by someone else other than yourself. That is why Father and I stress individual responsibility so much. You can't be given, you have to get it on your own. Things can be shown, but the actual walking and experiencing the path that you are taking must come by your own effort. If you expect you can just sit down, lay back and have someone teach you about God, go screw yourself because you will never get it. You'll never find it. That expectation will never meet God's expectation. "The reason that I believe in God is that He will cure my sickness. The reason that I believe in God is that He will make something happen in my life."' But that is not God's expectation. You will never realize God's expectation unless you experience God within yourself, by yourself. Do you understand what I am trying to say?
I go through a psychological battle every time I come here. I could use the time more wisely, but I see it in this way -- if I come here and share with you the best I can in that moment, it will affect you. With that in mind I come. I have a lot of things to do, I literally do. I have so many plans that demand work By myself with our skeleton crew, I just invested close to a million dollars worth of material and new equipment into Manhattan Center. I have to pay for it. I'm not going to run to Father saying, "Hey Father, give me a million dollars." I'm not going to say that. I've got to make that money some how. I'm branching out. We have three studios now. We're making a fourth studio and it's going to be really big, bigger than whatever I have now. I'm going to get a complete video editing suite. I want everything under my own roof. Nobody is going to tell me what to do; I'm going to do it myself. I don't want to go to Father to ask him for money. I want to give him money. "Hey Father, here is several million dollars, I know you can put it to good use." I want to do that -- even give Father a billion dollars. That's what we want to do, so we're trying to make it work.
Father is planning a lot of things. We have to let people in the future know Father's vision and Father's intention. We have to make his vision "seeable" and touchable. So, I know what I am doing is absolutely necessary. We've got to utilize these things and this is a way to get the word out to all the people of the world, not just an exclusive few but to everybody. Time is precious. This is a great thing to conserve time. Practically speaking, what better form or method do you know of for getting the word out to people? That is our mission and our goal in life; to get the word out, to help the people of the world change. I just can't believe that we haven't done anything about it. We don't need direction from Father. Let's raise it up on our own and make it big. That means that you have to have a certain talent. You have to know what it is and you have to give effort. Every time I play I try to do it better than what I did before. That is torture. I literally have to come up with a new song and record it every three days. That's how it works, that's how we do it. From nothing I did the third album in fourteen days. But I want to do more. That is not my end. I always forget whether it is for good or bad. Things I have done in the past, let it stay there, I go on. I try to do more. That should be the attitude of all of us; to never take comfort in what we did, but in what we can do and what we must do. That is what is needed here! Before you can smell the roses you have to clean your house. Make your children rejoice in God's name and True Parents name. Affect your surroundings. That should be your attitude. What else do I need to say. Go out into society. We've got to go out and get the word out! That is the bottom line; everybody should find a way.
It's frustrating as hell. It's tortuous, but somebody has to do it. Many times you just sit there and pass judgement without even knowing. What kind of false, unjust person is that? You don't know what goes through my mind. It is easy to judge. You don't know what goes on inside Father's mind. You don't know his responsibility. Even this justice system here gets to hear both sides of the story. What makes you so great that you are above everything, that you know everything without touching or knowing it? You don't even have enough basis or facts to assess and evaluate. Instead you just pass judgement. How would you like it if God were like that? Father is trying to teach you to become God-like. Do you think God is like that? I don't want that kind of God. God is more fair than that. He is true and just.
How much did you love Father? How much did you shed tears for Father? While you are suffering and shedding tears for your own sake, how much did you shed tears for Father's suffering? That's what he felt and experienced in order to understand God's heart. When you were starving or in pain, how much did you feel Father's pains? When you were lonely, how much did you feel Father's loneliness or someone else's for that matter? When you were down, when you were struggling, how much did you think about Father's struggles and suffering? Not much! Not enough! You've got no validity to judge others, especially Father. Is that just, fair and true?
Go out, you've got to find a better way to spread the word. Before Father dies I want to bring America and the world to Father. I'm getting a lot of offers, evidently the New York City Symphony and Ancestors concert at Carnegie Hall caused a commotion and certain excitement. However, I want to reach the whole world. A big distribution company in Japan wants to sign us, but I said, "No, not now. We'll hold on for that second." I want to break in America. If I break here I can write my own ticket anywhere else. So I want to hold off on anywhere else. That's why I need a good product, that's why we're trying to work on a better album for this current market.
Go out and do something about it. When somebody tells you, you just sit there. God, I hate that. That is what I despise the most. Do it on your own. Make yourself better before you start criticizing others. Make yourself worthy of the Blessing. Because you have the blessing, you have the potential to be worthy. However, you must make yourself worthy of the Blessing. Becoming a tribal messiah too, do you think that is an easy task? You must have it. Father is a symbol of how we should pattern ourselves. You need an example of the ideal. That is why Father is the True Parents to all the tribes. Father is the Messiah to the tribal messiahs. We need the model, but you are the physical people who will restore your own lineage. Through your physical presence, all your ancestry can be restored. Why? Without the foundation of substance there is no intervention. You can't receive anything. You have nothi